What Happens When You Step Outside Your Comfort Zone

Have you ever done something you were scared to do, or pushed yourself in a way you normally wouldn’t, and afterward felt incredibly accomplished? Proud of yourself? Maybe even a little smug?

I’m not a morning person. But when I first started getting up early to work out before work, I’d walk in at eight carrying what felt like a little secret.

Nobody knows I already worked out today.

I felt ridiculously accomplished! And it was never about anyone else knowing. It was about me knowing I had done it.

I think we collect these little secrets throughout our lives. Little pieces of evidence that we can do something uncomfortable, unexpected, or just slightly different from who we thought we were.

When I was 19, I flew to Alaska by myself without knowing anyone I was about to meet. I remember being terrified just to navigate the airport on my own. I cried about it.

But then I did it!

Later, I flew alone to Italy to meet a friend studying abroad, and figured out how to buy a train ticket in Europe. And then, and then, and then…

I ate insects from a vendor in Asia. Bungee jumped in Australia. Applied for jobs all over the world—and got hired for some pretty incredible ones. I didn’t take all of them, but even getting the offer became another little secret.

But it doesn’t have to be travel or some enormous leap.

I get a kick out of asking myself: What if I’m the type of person who does this?

What if I wear hot pink? What if I get bangs? What if I take a hip-hop dance class for the first time at 42 years old? Which I did last week!

Who even knows what you like until you try it?

We tell our kids to keep trying foods because their taste buds change. Well, so do ours. So do our interests. So do the things that bring us pleasure.

I just bought sparkly shoes for an entrepreneur conference. Shoes I normally never would have bought.

But why not? What if I like the way sparkly shoes make me feel?

Turns out, I did.

I don’t even know if anyone noticed them. I don’t care. I know I wore them. And I liked doing something outside of my norm.

Travel can do the same thing, sometimes on a much bigger scale (which is why I like it so much)!

I’ve watched it happen with our guests. One woman joined us in Bali having never traveled internationally before. Afterward, she traveled to Montreal on her own. Then BRAZIL!

Bali had given her a new piece of evidence about herself: I can do this.

Every time you do something that surprises you, you expand your idea of who you are. You become someone who has done the thing. And nobody else even needs to know. Because you know.

The morning workout. The sparkly shoes. The plane ticket. Bali. They all become evidence.

And that photo above? I REALLY did not want to pose for it. Somehow, doing that scared me more than so many of the things I’ve written about here.

But I did it. Another little piece of evidence. I’ve done things that scared me before. I can probably do this one, too.

Maybe that’s how we expand our lives, not all at once, but one little secret at a time.